A while back, I met her during the
conference of the young people of ACM which were both participants of the
events. After a year, she was hired from where I am working. Since then our
friendship seems to be good and doing fine. She used to be a friend not just an
ordinary friend but I owe her as one of my closest friend knowing that she’s
been a Christian for quiet sometime in the work place and even in the ministry.
Relationship wise, we have this so-called “closed-bonding relationship” we
became transparent from each other. Day by day we were both together wherever I
go she goes, we go out together and sometimes we share food in one plate and
chatted most of the times about the good things in our daily walk. I thought
that things seem to be going so well. But unfortunately, somewhere along the
way happen, it was when I found out that she is secretly punching-out an items
crediting in my account without my commendation. Of course, I didn’t believe
that she’s doing it to me because she actually getting an item credit to my
account with my permission and even I used to be the one who take on it and pay
the items oftentimes we go to the cafeteria. In my mind, I was thinking that
maybe she forgot to tell me that she is getting into it to credit into my
account. But noticeably, as I checked my credit summary and per information I
received first-hand from the management she’s doing it in a regular basis.
Circulating back in my mind
remains a question, why? Is it because we were so open from each other? Or is
it because she used to do it and became normal to her that I let her getting on
it? I must think to be that way but things seems turns to be different. I
learned to put my trust to her that somehow it would make our friendship works.
Back then it was not about the money I’ve been paying off at her expense, not
even about the items that she is getting not letting me know that she’s been
doing it. But what really comes into my mind is that the trust that I’d gave
more than to anybody else. Truly, she’s not the kind of a person I would think
could do such damn thing. I was being insulted after all the kindness I’d
showed up and really got mad at her. Oh! I’m stupid enough not to trust her again.
Minutes passed, there was like a
deafening silent as it was a hallow sound like a wooden gong. I stay on being
resilient on dealing with my emotion. I know then that it is not good to hit
some words back to her. I hate confrontation, really I hate it. Anyhow there’s nothing I could do but to deal with this
moves… It took me months to talk to her about what happened. I have to be calm
and determined at my words, cared not to offend her. I don’t want to be someone
like a nitpicker. I decided to tell exactly the way I felt about her.
Confrontation then flows, and it flow. Given the situation, I’ve been giving to
myself a half-way to her in an amicable way.
Until now, I still wonder why it
had to happen. And because of this experience, I’ve learned to be true of what
I truly felt because the more I hide it by myself the more it kills me inside.
I’ve become more mature because of this ordeal. And even if it hurts a lot, I
know I wouldn’t be who I am now if it weren’t for that.
Our memories are not always precise and in time everything changes.
A friend or brother once offended, even without knowing it, is very hard to win back (Proverbs 18:19).
